Job Searching : Blue :: Employment : Orange

If Job Searching is Blue, Employment is Orange

My search for a job is really getting me down.
My job is really getting me down.
My life is really getting me down.
I'm continually criticizing everything I make only to send it out and be rejected at every opportunity. So I keep editing my work, fixing problems, adding new work, but I'm still met with the same reaction. It's not good enough, someone else is more qualified.
Of course someone else is more qualified. Since when have I been #1 at anything. I was never the most talented, smartest, ambitious, or fastest at any of the things of done, but it never stopped me from trying, and I've done some really great things, but I'm at the point now where trying doesn't seem to be worth it anymore.
I know how to use the Adobe Creative Suite (illustrator, indesign, and photoshop to be exact) I can draw some pictures, heck, I can even make something look real; I got a degree from Minneapolis Community and Technical College. I see myself as an artist and if you hired me to work for you I could make you something beautiful and maybe even functional
I don't know what I want.
I want to get paid more than $9.50/hr.
I want to love my job.
I want to be happy.
I want to not feel alone and lost and useless.
I want to work hard on a project and see it through to the end and see someone become excited about my work and see someone enjoy what I made. I want to not feel poor. I want to be able to pay my bills and go grocery shopping and maybe have enough extra money to take my girlfriend out on a date from time to time. I want to save money. I want to have a family. I want to be proud of the work I do. I want to live my life. I don't want to be weighed down by my underemployment. I don't want to waste my life selling shit I can't afford to people with more money to spend in an evening than I make in 2 weeks. I want to work for a company that loves people not profits. I want to spend my evenings and weekends with the people that are important to me not at work because the only shifts available are at night.
I want to be a graphic designer because I love to make things. I want to make things. I want to design your name. I want to design your card. I want to design your product. I want to design your store. I want to design your website. I want to design your customer's experience. I can make all of those things. I can make them better than they are and I can make them better than you can imagine them.
I just need to be employed.
I need to be scraped up off the curb and put to work.
I just want to start my career, and I want to shine. I'm sick of my stagnant life. I want a change. I need a change.
This job searching business is not for me, I'm an artist. I'm a graphic designer.

C 8 H 10 N 4 O 2 and me

At this time, 8:30, just about every morning, as the coffee I've eagerly consumed begins to kick in, I feel as if I could accomplish anything. Perhaps it's all in my head, perhaps it's the effect of Sufjan Stevens' The Age of Adz album playing, but more than likely it's the C ₈ H ₁₀ N ₄ O ₂ (caffeine) taking hold of my central nervous system, making me feel like there isn't a project too big, and every idea I have is the greatest.
Today, at the exact same time I began to become excited about the tasks I want to do today: go to work, sell shoes, work on my design portfolio, prepare for my informational interview tomorrow, run… the list goes on, but as my thoughts began to shift from what I want to do to what I need to do the list revealed the chores I'm not nearly as excited about; laundry, dishes, sweeping, vacuuming, more laundry, folding laundry, more dishes, laundry again.
My loss of momentum is my fastest action yet today.
8:45 and I've lost hope in the day?
ugh.
I want more coffee.

hello dishes, hello laundry

Images from my desk

I have a drafting table for a desk. It currently stand at a height of 41in in the front and 43in in the back. I like the height because I prefer to stand while I work. I keep a cutting mat at the front right and a set of architectural plans turned upside down (for scrap paper, notes to myself and sketches) in the front left. In the rear are odds and ends (pens, pencils, erasers and cribbage boards to name a few). These are a few snapshots from my desk, or a kind of portrait of an extension of myself.

Ragnar Relay: Great River — My mapped legs

These are the three legs of the Great River Ragnar Relay that I'm running this coming Friday and Saturday.

If my math is somewhat close to being correct, after starting from Winona at 6:00am on Friday morning, my teammates will run a total of 4 hours and 13 minutes before I have my first leg of 8.2 miles.

After my first leg, which should take me approximately one hour and 6 minutes, my teammates will run for a combined total of 9 hours and 45 minutes (roughly) before I run my second leg of 6.2 miles. This second leg should take me 53 minutes to complete. At this point in the relay the time should be 10 pm and I'll have another 9 hours and 13 minutes before I have to run again.

My third and last leg will be 7 miles long and should take me an hour to complete it. My team, the Rock-N-Runners, should cross the finish line at 1:46 pm on Saturday with a total time of 31 hours and 46 minutes.

This is all based on estimated pace and will more than likely not be our actual finishing time.


View Ragnar 2011 Great River in a larger map

LeMonde.fr : Le Japon pourrait interdire la viande de boeuf de Fukushima

Le Japon pourrait interdire la viande de boeuf de Fukushima
2011/07/15 | 12:54:23 | LEMONDE.FR avec AFP

Les autorités de Tokyo ont annoncé avoir détecté un taux de césium radioactif de 650 becquerels par kilogramme  contre une limite autorisée de 500 becquerels  dans de la viande issue d'un des 13 boeufs livrés dans la capitale.

Retrouvez l'intégralité de cet article sur LeMonde.fr :
http://www.lemonde.fr/tiny/1549251/

Make your own satellite, kinda

http://www.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/programmes/click_online/9555369.stm

A Day Made of Glass... Made possible by Corning.